Do We Need a Guide?
Occasionally when fishing we hire a guide. Usually when a boat is required or if we are going somewhere that would be unfamiliar, possibly even unsafe. These guys earn their wages, but it isn’t cheap. They spend long days on the water trying to predict the unpredictable; fish are as bad as the weather in knowing what they are going to do. They know their beat like the back of their hand and they give you confidence to press in or give up on a particular spot. There are no guarantees, even with a great guide, but their attitude can make or break your trip more than the number of fish you land.
What if you aren’t fishing? Is there ever a time when you need a guide? Absolutely! Unless of course, you already know EVERYTHING. As for me, I will continue to use guides, in life and on the water, for the rest of my life. So, what do you look for in a guide?
Experience – To make really good choices like where to go, and where not to go, we need the help of someone who has already been there. Someone who knows the shortcuts and pitfalls, with the bonus of pointing out all the cool things that you might have missed, had you been on your own.
Familiarity –To be perfectly honest, I’m most prone to a panic attack when I am lost. In fact, it is one of the few times I might get into an argument with my husband. (Hmm, it might actually not be his fault…I’ll think about that later) Anyway, I can actually enjoy the day if I know someone else is keeping track of getting me back home.
Perspective – They see what you can’t. They usually have a vantage point that is higher than yours, their eyes are trained to see what it could take you years to make out. I can’t tell you the number of times a guide will ask me if I see a fish in front of me. I have to admit that I don’t, and they will say something like, “10 o’clock, 30 feet”. How crazy would it be for me to wait until I have seen it for myself? I guarantee, I would have missed out on a lot of great fish!
Trust – Why would you invest in someone’s expertise, and then not take full advantage of it? And yet, I hear stories of people who do just that. They already know it all, and maybe just want an audience, or they are just ignorant. I have no other possible reasons. You must trust that your guide cares about your experience. Sure, you invested in them, but remember they have invested in you too: their expertise, reputation and time. They rejoice with you when you land a great fish and commiserate on the one that got away.
Communication – This works both ways. Not only will the guide need to clearly direct you to your goals, but it is your responsibility to clearly state what your objectives are. When either side fails to speak up, and more importantly listen, there doesn’t seem to be any point in continuing on together.
Choosing a Guide – Finding someone to help guide you through life certainly has higher stakes than a day of fishing. It’s important to find someone who meets all of the above criteria, but that you also want to be around. If it is just general guiding, look around at the people already in your life. Do you have a trusted mentor? Is there a Diva who already speaks truth into your life? It could be a friend, co-worker, relative, or spiritual leader. If you don’t have anyone already, look around at the people on the fringe of your sphere of influence. I imagine there is someone that you admire and have always wanted to get to know better. Ask them out for coffee and let them know you are looking for a mentor. Most people would be honored, if they have the time. Remember the answer is always no, if you never ask. If there is no one for you to talk to, find a support group, I recommend Celebrate Recovery. It’s for anyone with “hurts, habits, or hang-ups”. There, you can find an appropriate sponsor, and walk through a 12 Step Study that is surprisingly helpful for really anyone.
If there is a specific area that requires skilled guiding, seek professional help, and don’t be afraid to invest finances in your own development. It may be a personal coach, or even a counselor. My best advice is to consult the ultimate guide, God. He will help you find just the right guide to help you navigate unfamiliar waters.